[day 6] consistency is the key

I was taking it easy. I was lying in bed like I normally do for about 15-30 minutes after work to rejuvenate.  Evan took an early nap during the day so he was completely knocked out. Aiden was in the bathroom doing a number two. I don’t know if he held it since school. Dylan wouldn’t dare to ever go at school. He said he likes to do his number twos at home because it’s clean. Then, of course, while the other two were occupied, he was the only one who wanted to fly like an airplane nonstop. He wanted to fly and be thrown high above the sky and make a smooth (or should I say hard) landing onto the pillows. This is my version of relaxing. It’s never nice and quiet unless it’s during the weekend when all our boys nap at the same time. Yes, we’ve trained them to nap at the same time to allow us time to restore our energy.  

Now that we’re on this topic, people always wonder how we keep our boys on one schedule. It takes a lot of patience, but eventually if you train them right, you would be able to nail this. We put them on the same nap schedule as mentioned above to give us a break. Somehow, with each addition, we make it work.

Every parent needs a break whether it is for half an hour or an hour. We are very consistent, keep the same bedtime routine, no motion (i.e. rocking our baby) – For Aiden and Dylan, we tell them, it’s time to go down for a nap and their body is so used to it that they normally do. They only have request from us and that is, they can’t sleep without papa or me singing them a prayer.  As for Evan, we turn on his humidifier to avoid any muffle sound and play instrumental music for him. He gets his bottle of milk, we tell him night, close the door, and he will knock out within 5 minutes. The same routine is applied for their nap and bedtime sleep.

The rule is being consistent and making sure it happens daily in the same order every night. If you can do this, your kids would know the sleep cues. Like they say, happy kids make happy parents. I’m not an expert, but just a mom who tries to find balance one way or another.

Love my boys. XOXO

[day 5] picture perfect wednesday

it's always easier when we're out and about sometimes. i don't know what got into me today, but i wanted to take a quick 10 minutes photo session of my boys for fun. i always keep it to 10 minutes because they get fired up and start doing their own thing. the pictures you see are from my iphone. i did capture a few on my SLR that i will post sometime this week. 

it's easy to take pictures of my boys. i let them create the experience for me to capture. you will never see me pose them because i don't ever like to. i give them their space, stand near by, and let them do whatever they want with each other. it's almost as if i've removed myself from the situation to allow them to play together and relate to each other in their way. 

yeah, they see me taking pictures and would ask "oh mom, you're taking pictures of me". (duh) yes, honey.

the good thing about pictures is that it will help them understand and recall what they did together. sometimes, we would lay in bed and i'll whip out my phone to show them pictures or sometimes, they'll just use my phone and browse through the pictures themselves. they'll talk to each other about it or run like a cheetah to ask me if i remember that on this day they did "XXXX". they ALWAYS ask if i remember because they have no clue that mama can retain all the memories they've shared with me.

pictures are my way of sharing memories with my boys. it's a story of our time together and hopefully, would make them appreciate each other even through times when they argue or get mad at each other. it's not the end of the world. we're a family and a team. i want to give them a sense of security, but want to ensure that they build a bond with each other like how i'm building it with them.

love my boys. xoxo.

[day 4] parenting quality time

this is one of our many versions of quality time. aiden was on the floor doing his lego, dylan was laying beside me in bed, and evan and papa were playing a game of "lets pretend i'm flying like an airplane". nothing beats an afternoon like this. it helped me tremendously since i feel like a dinosaur right now and need to take it easy. plus, evan is extremely attached to me. now that he can call my name "mama", he constantly yearns for me. he's getting bigger and my growing tummy is not helping me at all. he gets heavy to carry at times. i'm forever thankful that i have my husband. i wouldn't make it without his help. thank goodness he loves kids!

love my boys. xoxo.

[day 3] building legos

(thank goodness for iphone pics)

My tummy was bothering me today, but I managed. Aiden came home from school and after he ate his food, he instantly wanted to work on his Lego. He asked me to watch him just in case he needed help. Of course, I couldn’t resist because I knew he needed me. I know there are days where I’m extremely exhausted and tell him to wait, but for the most part, I normally give in. I knew I had to do it for him because if I show that I care it only encourages him to thrive.

He never ceases to amaze me. We always worked on building Legos together, but for the first time ever, I asked him to try doing it on his own the other day. So far, so good – I taught him how to count the bricks and to match it up to what the page is showing. Once he’s done, I told him his piece should match the picture. I know Lego is designed to help a child’s intellect and creative skills. That’s what one of the things I love about it. It offers endless possibilities.

Anyways, I told Aiden today, if he is able to complete his Lego set, he would get rewarded. I’ll buy him another box to build and that totally sealed the deal. We had to rush to Target before dinner to pick him up a new box.  You can guess which one he wanted – STAR WARS. Oh, I always keep my promise, too.

On a side note, you’ll never see my kids in front of the television for more than an hour. They only time they’re allowed to watch is when we’re in the car and maybe if we have a movie night. They normally watch in the morning for about 30 minutes but that’s about it. I’m not a huge advocate of kids watching television because I believe playing and allowing a child to explore would only help them with their physical and social development as opposed to them being a couch potato. But, TV is a good thing for preschoolers who can learn the alphabets and other things – that’s why we play it in the car as their source of entertainment/escapism.

In the end, I always show my appreciation. We’re humans, we like to feel appreciated, too. So, I make sure my kids feel the same way and get the support when they ask for it or need it. 

Life is becoming more challenging every day. The more kids I have, the more challenges I’m faced with. I’m OK with it. I’ve chosen this life because I want it. I wouldn't trade it for the anything.. 

Love my boys. XOXO.

[day 3] the craziness of eating out

You know, the one thing I try to avoid is taking our kids to a not-so-friendly kid restaurant unless we’re in and out of the place within 45 minutes. I don’t know about some of the moms out there, but my two oldest are fine, it’s just Evan. Evan is at the stage where he can’t sit in his high chair for a long time and gets easily distracted.  He wants to walk or be carried around. It’s never enjoyable when my husband or I take turns to carry or walk him around while the other one eats. Although, he’s fine if we’re there for no more than 45 minutes – anything more is a disaster. Sometimes, we can’t avoid the situation since we have guest in town and that’s what happened tonight.

I don’t know how many times I said “no” tonight ever time his small, little hand gravitated towards the food, cup, etc. It was quite unpleasant, but I already know that he has yet to master his two skills of sitting and waiting. Plus, I already know that taking a small toddler to a restaurant is not the place to relax or enjoy myself. I still love my little “mup” though.

Anyways, here’s a picture of my chef Dylan from tonight. He loves to cook and bake anywhere and anytime.

Love my boys. XOXO

[day 2] the power of play

Today was extremely exhausting. We had our show and tell at our boy’s private Montessori school. The purpose of this was to get to understand what our boys are learning and how they’ve developed these past five months. Since Dylan is the second child, the teacher thought it was imperative to assign him first. His appointment was 10:40 a.m. for an hour. Then, Aiden had his at 1:00 p.m.

Dylan is improving in his language and motor skills development. I like how the program uses the power of play to incorporate techniques such as holding a pencil properly. Dylan was building these blocks for me from biggest to smallest, but they had to match it in order to be stacked up higher. The higher he went, the smaller the block gets and by getting smaller, it would eventually teach him to hold his pencil correctly. Then, he showed me the number system. He would trace the number with his fingers and then add the amount of beads to that number he just traced. Besides his short time of showing me what he was able to learn, I was shocked that he knew the five oceans.

Aiden is advancing faster than I ever would expect. I consider him a strategic person. Ever since he was 3, he was so good at playing video games even though he was limited to playing it at either his aunt meow’s house or at home. He was always a whiz at figuring out puzzle. And now he’s building his own Lego pieces together by reading the manual. At school, he was able to show me his reading, spelling, and math skills. Based on my observation of his schoolwork today, it made me realize why he does what he does. It’s the way the program taught him to think by utilizing the power of play. He incorporates what he learns in school and applies it to his every day life at home.

I spend a good amount of time with each of my boys by teaching them their Kumon books at home every week (probably 20 minutes a day a few times) and of course, i encourage reading (you should know why). However, I spend the majority of my time interacting and engaging in imaginative play with them because I believe this would prepare them for academic and social success. Play helps fosters healthy and social development and it will contribute to the literature of how my boys learn (in my opinion). I let them be kids. I’m not looking for them to be the top of their graduating class and to push them so hard – but rather guide them to make the right choices in life and be proud of the efforts they put into their work by gaining knowledge. Knowledge is the key - I don't care what pace they learn it as long as they eventually get it in the end.

As I sat to watch each of my boys today, I continue to feel blessed and thank the Lord for giving me such  beautiful gifts in life. It almost made me cry to watch them because deep down inside I felt proud. I’m proud of my boys. I’m challenged as a mom in so many ways and I do try. I’m trying to give it my all. Believe it or not, it's evident in their actions that makes me know I'm doing just fine. 

Love my boys. XOXO.

[day 1] just us. park day

People never see this side of my kids. Depending on who they’re with, they can be extremely wild and free. They’re really shy in the beginning and can eventually warm up to love you and drive you nuts. I have to admit, both my two oldest have a good heart in different ways. Every parent has their own ways of raising up their kids and this is my way. I should really say “our” way because it’s a two team effort between papa dang and me. We’ve definitely taught them the meaning of love (see video).

Today, I decided to take our boys to the park after they had their breakfast and took their bath. It was just us since Papa normally works on Saturday until 1 p.m. I always manage to take the three of them out because the two oldest can listen and follow my many commands. I always find it easier to watch them when it’s just us since they’re always on their best behavior because they want to go out somewhere.

Evan loves the swings. Aiden and Dylan love playing together. That’s probably one of the best things I’ve ever invested in – that is, having our kids close in age. They love riding their scooters or skateboards together and today, they’ve elected to bring their scooter to the park.

Anyways, here’s a small clip of them on the swing together that I captured while pushing Evan on the swing (which you can’t see).  They’re bilingual so if you don’t understand Vietnamese, you won’t understand their conversation. No worries, I’ve translated it for you:

Aiden: If you keep swinging like that, you’re going to get hurt and your head will break.

Aiden: Do you want to sit on the swing like me? I'll push you. Do you want to?

Dylan: Yah.

Aiden: Do you want to? Do you want me to push you Dylan?

Dylan: Yes (screams)

This is the best part of being a mom. It made me happy to see that Aiden cared for his brother (granted, they can get on each other nerves, too). But in all honesty, this is not the typical conversation you’ll hear from a 4-year old. It’s their relationship and bond. I’m so proud of the person they’re becoming and hope it continues to be good with our support and love.

Love my boys. XOXO.